That stupid bitch Karma and her ugly boyfriend Mr. Murphy.

Have I told you about my windscreen wipers? Last week I sort of forgot I was driving out into the road along my parents house because I was fiddling with the radio volume. The car rolled right into a tree and managed to get the wipers tangled up in a few branches. As I reversed the (unscratched or dented) car, the wipers were mixed up and swapped around and very buckled. I managed to bend them back to normal(ish) and went on my merry way.

Yesterday in the downpour of heavy rain, the wipers started going crazy and the timing went out so much so that they started banging into each other and then went the opposite way. I eventually had to pull off the freeway in my tiny T-shirt and skirt only* and detach the left wiper from the bloody bonnet of the car, and turn the other one around.

This morning the monkeys must have been around because I got to my car and both wipers are now wilted and buckled and twisted. The left one refuses to work at all and the right one (That bitch Karma and her ugly boyfriend Mr. Murphey’s law would indicate this wiper, the one that I needed most, would be the worst one off too) was so buckled and bent that it only allows for small streams of window to be wiped.

To make things worse, I overslept by two hours this morning and if Conan hadn’t decided to give me a call when he did I would probably still be in bed. Thanks for the rude awakening shit head 😉

Anyway, my point to this whole story: I need you dudes out there to tell me where I can get new wiper things from? Do they come separate? Do I have to find a VW agent? How many legs and arms will I have to donate?

* Jerseys. Urgh. I hate them! Unless it’s a jumper, I won’t wear it.