How to not kill a man

when you are living with him in his own home:

  1. Smile sweetly when you’d rather smack him over the head with a beer bottle (the Bergie’s* are rubbing off on me)
  2. Don’t bitch about the toilet seat being left up.  Really, its not that difficult to just flip it down.  He’s gotta flip it up, right?  So its a fair deal I suppose.
  3. Cook the man some good food.  It makes him happy.  Nuff said.
  4. Don’t leave your shit lying all over the place. 

I’m a cool housemate I think.  Its been an easy adjustment, actually.  7 days and counting and I haven’t killed him yet!


*  Foreign translation for all you over-the-seas type people:  Bergies are technically coloured folk of lower class.  Very characteristic and entertaining to watch.  A love of cheap wine in brown packet bags is not uncommon.  They come fully loaded with missing two front teeth otherwise known as a love-gap**


** love-gaps.  Mouths.  That show love.  Orally.  Ya know whaddayimean?



 ASIDE:  Just for Bridge, I’m in hufflepuff!  Kreacher belongs to bloody Slytherin.  Take that you dozy bitch.  Yes, I stole that from you too 😛


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