20
Retards on the internet.
This thread really pissed me off. For those of you lazy buggers who won’t click the link, its a forum thread dedicated to dissing Jeremy Nell’s work, even going as far as comparing him to (yuck!) Zapiro and accusing Jeremy of being a wannabe.
First off, I would have replied to that thread had the forum actually allowed me to, but after registering and then having to request a resend of the confirmation email, I was booted out each time I clicked the reply to thread button [yo, dudes, you should probably fix that- it sucks quite a bit] which obviously lead me to thinking ‘fuck it’ and then, ranting in my own blog.
Look, I get that Jeremy is my number one fan I’m Jeremy’s number one fan (well, I probably take turns of sharing it with his girlfriend Janel, but I’m the Chief Pom-pomerer , I’m sure she gets that) so this might sound a bit biased, but here’s my point of view:
Click to enlarge:
Obamarama: Zapiro's version.
Obamarama: Jeremy's version.
Right, so Jeremy apparently copied Zapiro since the latter cartoonist published on a Sunday and Jeremy on a Monday. I have an issue with this for the following reasons:
- Those twits completely missed the point: Zapiro portrays shoes being chucked at the podium while, to me, Jeremy is pointing out that Bush’s shoes aren’t really that big to fill in the first place. Look at the size of Obama’s feet man! And his look of incredulance at the size of Bush’s tiny, tiny shoes. He doesn’t reference that shoe throwing incident at all.
- Obama is big news right now. At this very moment I am watching (mostly with glazed-over eyes) his inauguration on TV. The whole world is talking about him and of course with that, comes the topic of Bush and also, maybe, shoes. So if Jeremy (shock, horror, gasp!) made a reference to shoes, because “oh dear, look, there was a shoe reference in The Sunday Times!” naturally this means he’s trying to be Zapiro? Yawn.
- Never once have I ever heard, read or seen Jeremy Nell refer to himself as a political cartoonist. If anything he’s an anti-cartoonist. Controversial and in your face. He’s not trying to be anyone but himself which is what irks people, I think.
- Just for the record, Jeremy did do his own cartoon about the Bush shoe throwing incident, over a month ago.
- And also, I don’t know if you’d noticed, but big news items happen to be repeated, rewritten and in this case, redrawn over and over again with each different person’s perspective. Especially in cartoonism – most cartoonists think alike from what I can see.
- “Oh but he’s just young”, they say. And your point? I think its fabulous that in less than three years this “young” cartoonist has made such a mark. I think it is just AWESOME that Zapiro’s fans seem to think there’s someone out there of the same caliber, because he is. Zapiro may not be my favourite but he’s certainly distinguished himself hasn’t he, and if Jeremy is right up there being nominated for the same awards, at the same functions and in the same interviews I can just cheer right along with the best of The Nell Fans and say to the ballie cartoonist, move over old man – your retirement is nigh!
Sadly, one of my readers is one of the main instigators. I’ll have to catch him in private, tie him down and have my way with a word with him. It’s absolutely fine to have a difference of opinion, in my opinion, as long as your opinion matches mine. No seriously though, I think they went a bit overboard. But then again…
8
Bogged Up, not down
I am one of those people that cannot do my business in anyone else’s toilet besides my own and a select few others, for example; my mom, B’s house or sometime at my dad. But only when everyone is far away and very busy so that I know I wont be missed. I can then poo in peace.
This weekend, I added someone to that list, that would be Kimbo’s boyfriends farm house. It is huge, therefore I felt comfortable (and very desperate) enough to do my thang. Except I didn’t bargain on the toilet not flushing.
I couldn’t ask Kimbo what to do as I had bargained on everyone busying themselves in the kitchen having coffee, and not noticing that I wasn’t there. Eyeing out that top bit of the toilet, I decide that it can’t be too difficult to make it flush, right? Wrong.
The minute I pulled the pump thingy up, I knew I had made the gravest of errors. Without hesitation, the murky water in the toilet bowl started rising. And rising and rising and rising.
Dear Moses, what had I done? The water was now flowing out from under the toilet seat and onto the floor, all over my blue and white cloud printed jarmies. I stood there in a blind panic, now they would surely know. How utterly embarrassing! In a flash of brilliance, I was smart enough to push the plastic balloon thing back so the flood stopped mid air.
Aside from the toilet paper roll I had just dropped on the floor and into the water (which had now drenched the bathroom mat and tiles), there was nothing I could use to clean up. Except for what was in the bathroom next door. Holding up the bottom of my pants, I silently tip toe down the corridor to the next bathroom, leaving a trail of wet footprints, and grab a handful of dirty towels from the laundry basket.
Satisfied the floor is at least dry, I pop into my bedroom and change the clothes which are now soaking wet. I didn’t want to, but knew I had to admit to what had just happened. Which happened to be over breakfast in the dining room, where everyone was snacking on bacon and eggs.
Kimbo’s bf Wallnut starting giggling as soon as I told my tale, until he was reminded that as he had not bothered to have the toilet fixed weeks ago, he would be the one to unblock the godforsaken thing.
Amoungst much laughter, he performed a brilliant running commentry to us (still eating bacon and eggs at the table) of each function and movement he was making, through the walls of the house. Colours, textures, look-a-likes, barfing sounds and blocked-nose syllables.
"Gross, Sheena – it looks like a kidney!"
"Omygod, I think it just gave birth to another one!"
"Yup, thats definately a spawn of the last one"
"Di doo eat buch bexican food?"
I am never going to be able to live this down or, more importantly, be able to poo anywhere in peace again.
