Vis vang, julle.


Cath: But dude, it has a cross on the wall.  Lots of crosses, actually.

Me: I know, that’s probably why the price is so much lower.  You know something bad happened there.

Cath: Yup, violent death.

Me: Rapey ghosts with murder tendencies, for sure.

Cath: S’okay, will come visit and we can seance and sage the f*ck out of that house

Me: Yip, all the happy hippie ghosts can be welcomed in to protect us and chase the bad ghosts away. LOOK AT THAT KITCHEN.  I COULD COOK FOR TEN FAMILIES IN THERE.

Cath: The family that lives there?  Definitely called the van der Merwe’s.  And the wife is blonde and wears leopard print.  I can tell.  What’s the bet he asks the vrou if he can put it **************[censored]*********.

Me: I’m suspicious of this price though, seriously. It’s below our budget so there must be something wrong.  I think there was a corpse discovered or something.

Cath: I know.  Like, are they fleeing the country?  Divorcing?

Me: Someone died, I bet you.  A violent death.

Cath: Is it because he spends too much time on his boat?

Me: Vis vang, julle.  Hey, do you think the dog comes with the property? Please say yes.

Cath: No, the dog doesnt come with the property. It goes with wife in the divorce.  It’ll have to, it matches her leopard print cushions.  NO MAN WOULD WILLINGLY HAVE LEOPARD PRINT CUSHIONS IN HIS HOUSE.  Maybe he hunts? Hence the African decor. Maybe he sails a dinghy?  No self respecting yachtsman does NOT park his BOAT in his driveway, so i can only assume. Dinghy. His wife hates it. Which is when she makes him sleep in the other room, or in the lounge, or by the bar, or outside by the rock water feature.  It’s uncomfortable, but he can see the stars.


So it’s totally premature to be blogging about this even, but Jon and I are kind-of looking at houses.  Online and drive-by’s on Sundays.  Just to see what’s out there, we’re not even sure we’re ready to buy or anything.

We’ve found a few places that neither of us liked, both of us kind of liked, none that we’ve argued over, but none that really screamed “be my owners, I’ll be good to you, I’ll bring you health, wealth and happiness and love and good times”.

Until I saw this one online.  This is the first one that got me excited.  So I’m going to smile sweetly tonight and convince Jon that we need to look past the navy slash African decor, the ugly bar and odd curtain rails so that we can go see this place in person.

So that’s what I’ve been up to lately, you?

PS: Don’t you love Cath‘s imagination?  It’s why I became friends with her, she’s never dull to play with.  Follow her on Twitter here, she’s promised to start swearing again because she’s going through a rebellious stage.


  1. Heidi says:

    Yay for house shopping!
    Boo for the fact that you embedded an image that looked like a carousel. I kept clicking the next button and getting frustrated as FUCK because it didn’t work. And that is NOT funny, don’t tease OCD retarded web users.

    From what I can see, I concur. Violent death. But hey, a cheap house is a cheap house!


  2. Jessica Giggles says:

    I’m so glad I wasn’t the only one trying to click to see the next pic… 🙂

    From my experience, if the house speaks to you, you should listen. You may need to see past the awful decor or paint colour to see what could be.

    Fingers crossed!

  3. Kate Kearney says:

    Thanks Sheena, I have done zero work since yesterday upon finding your blog.

    On houses – the first one we looked at went something like this:

    Estate Agent (with a mouth full of food): “HellowelcomemynameisJan if you look at that room at the end of the lounge, the room that’s not a bedroom even though it has a bed in it, then if you look under the bed there’s a Jacuzzi underneath. We don’t know if it works though because we cant lift the heavy boxes off said bed.”

    Needless to say, I couldnt see past the family of revolting hoarders, and we did not buy the house.

    I’m guessing you never got past the navy slash African decor?

    Good Luck!

Comments are closed.