Please can I say something? Men suck. They do. Don’t sit there reading this and tell me that you’re different, okay? Shut up and stop lying, you lying little sack of poo. You are all crap! What with your stupid little penises, and your car fetishes, and your ability to change stupid light globes and what not. Who needs you anyway? I feel that we chickies were all laced with far too much generosity in spilling our emotion on you dudes. I mean, lets be honest here – we don’t get it back. If it weren’t for procreation, I would vote for eliminating the lot of most of you. Bleh!

To my friend who was slapped with a small case of men fuckwittage, I love you. You are awesome, and you deserve so much more than that person who didn’t know what he had and hopefully realizes now that he’s lost it. Hell, if I was lesbian, I’d totally jump you. Here’s to the PPP!

Cath and I did a Pina party on Saturday night, just the two of us, all on our own, sitting on the lounge floor. It was awesome! Completely spontaneous, too, it’s always the best time to have fun. Small pity I then went and drunk twitteraged myself to oblivion. The guys haven’t let me forget it!

Anyway, that’s not my point. What is my point, is that my special friend and I went out this weekend and blew a whole lot of money on clothes, shoes, hoodies, scarves, a hand bag, hats, beanies, make up & jewellery. Realistically speaking, I think we independently funded The Pavilion in all its glory to remain open on a Sunday. Retail therapy baby, get out of our way, men! We’re not above kicking you in the nuts!

I might not be able to eat for the duration of… oh, I don’t know, this lifetime, but by God I will look fucking good at it! This is me, eating beans on toast, but look how sexy my shoes are.

Happy Monday. NOT!

Countdown til my birthday: 5 more sleeps!