Stereotyping Humans

Have you ever just sat and people watched? I know I have. I do it all the time. Being one of those people who notice other people in their cars can sometimes prove to be very interesting.

For example, I bet you the women who whizz past us in their flashy cars yawning with their mouths wide open and looking like they’re about to swallow their steering wheel don’t get that we know they are usually the ones for public fartation. You know, the kind when you’re in a Woolies* cheese and egg isle and you smell the silent, but violent ones. It hits your nose first, and so you look up with your tear-stained eyes only to see a Sandton Mommy with her manicured nails and high-lighted ridiculous long in front, short at back hair do, and you think to yourself;

“Yeah, bitch, I know it was you, and you know I know”.

The same goes for dudes who hum there cars slowly and silently nearby in the next lane, listening to Radio 2000, discreetly picking their nose, but then try and cover it up as if its just a scratch across the nostrils. Those are the fuckers who get caught on camera and have the security staff howling with laughter as they put their grubby nose picking hands down their pants and scratch the befuckery out of the nutsack while picking up a quick bag of ice at the Caltex**

We know who you are, you little sneaky nose picking nutsack scratching dipshits. You aren’t that discreet.

We’re always watching you. I’d remember that if I were you.

* Woolies – fancy foodchain store with supposed luxury installed. Pff. Whatever.

** Caltex is one of the many petrol station companies

I’ll end off by leaving you two funnies that had me in hysterics today:

And then this delight:

This entry was posted in car.