At the moment, I sit here listening to the sound of Gloria cutting her nails using my nail clippers.  I assume this is punishment to me for not letting her have my handbag.

Gloria: Sheentjie, I love this bag.  I can take it home with me? For my son? She will love it also.

Me: Um, no.

Gloria: But why, marra?

Me: Because Gloria, I use this bag.  It has my things in it.  Why does your son want a hand bag?

Gloria: For her school.

Me: Gloria, sorry, but I can’t give you this bag.  I gave you two black bags full of things last week when I cleaned out my things!  There were bags in there for you.  Lots of them.  What I have left in this house now is stuff I want to keep.

Gloria: Okay.  I can have this ombrel?

Me (getting irritated at having to look up from my computer again): what is an ombre– oh.  My umbrella.  Sigh.  No, I’m sorry, you can’t have this ombrel, damnit, UMBRELLA.  It was just given to me!

Gloria: it’s fine.  The milk she is sour, I make you tea.

Me: No, no, thank you.  I don’t need tea.

Gloria: The milk she is sour, give for me R50 please to go buy the milk.

I handed the R50 over, with pleasure, so that I could get a 20 minute break from Gloria.  Honestly, it’s not worth staying at home sick if she’s here.  Especially since I’m sitting here listening to the sound of her cutting her nails using my nail clippers!

PS: My first Memeburn article went live today, check it out here.


  1. Angel says:

    Girl, you have ALL my sympathy.
    And the kak part? To get her to stop asking means never giving her anything ever again!
    How long was she gone and how much change did you get from the milk purchase?

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