Mon 20Q…with Cath @ The Shath!

I have a bit of a scoop for you.  It’s also Monday 20Q, so I thought I would combine the two.  Please say hello to someone who most of you know very well by now, my soon to be ex homie, Cath Jenkin.

We have some big news – would you like to tell everyone?
The Shath is over.  Hee hee, it’s not because the scissoring was crap though.  No one died, nothing bad, its life.  We still haven’t scissored yet though, disappointingly. Sheena has decided to move out.

What do you think the biggest change will be?
No more weird smells.

What the fuck?
Haha.  No, you won’t be here for me to bitch at.  And you’ll be waking up a lot earlier and a lot less willingly with even less morning friendliness.

What do you think the biggest rumour is going to be about me moving out?
I think they’ll say it’s about a boy.  I just want you guys to know:  it’s not about a boy, or a girl, or a donkey. I’m just saying.

Tell us the one thing you won’t miss.
The weird smells.  Oh my god!  Your inability to turn taps off properly.  Although, have to admit, you didn’t explode the tap this morning, Fred did.  I don’t think he’s too pleased with you moving out.

Tell us who Fred is.
Fred is a ghost; we blame everything paranormal on him.  He is also very obviously related to me, quite closely in fact. He likes Sheena, and we think he exploded the tap because she said she is leaving soon.

What are you looking forward to?
October being over, so I can dye my hair again [Ed:  it’s orange at the moment]

Tell us about your day today
My shoe broke this morning.  The geyser.  The tap exploded.  Got stuck in veg isle again with random old people, and a child was wearing a suit.  His priestly church going father shouting at kid the kid for fighting with his sister “THAT IS NOT GOD’S WAY!  YOU WILL NOT FIGHT IN PICK N PAY!”.  I canned myself.

What will you use my room for now?
I shall hold a séance.  Jokes.  I’m not sure right now.  I’ll tell you when I’ve cleaned up okay?  (Stares at my shoes strewn in every corner and wayward tossed towel on floor)

What have you learned from the last 6 months?
That I’m impossible to live with?  Haha.  (4 minute pause) it’s been a quintessential lesson, actually:  There are six million things you can do with pasta, but only three of them taste good!

I’ll miss your tea.
As crap as it is?  Badly stirred, lacking sugar, low tide… half full… you’re full of shit.
*Cath does the SCKCK4T backward hand motion*

Are you going to enjoy your time alone with cam?
Yes and no.  Yes because any time with cam is awesome.   No because i know that sometimes i can drive myself insane alone.

Do you think our phone bills will go up again now that we’ll be living separately?
Dude, have you met us?  When we lived together it was worse!  One of the first things we said was “at least we’ll save on phone bills”.  WhatEVER!

What are you going to be keeping out of this relationshit?
Your GHD.

Smoke your other sock, Jenkin.
Okay fine, I want some Tiff chocolate before you go.  Oh my god, I am going to miss our random hand signals that only we understand.  Like when a certain someone asked me a life question and I needed to silently scream around the corner.  You totally got that.

Is it true that you wanna be here when I pack up my stuff?
Yes.  I’m having huge anal tendencies that you’ll nick my whisk.  Not in a euphemistic kind of way, I’m just really quite possessive about my actual whisk.

Ha!  Too bad you’ll be away on business when I move out.  Hey at least you get to have more space on the windy dryer again.
Sarcastic woot.  Have you met Cameron’s clothing fetish?  I’m going to miss the farting compos.

Dude, I never needed to compete with you, you’re the champion without contest.
I know, I gross people in china out.

Now that the days of The Shath are over, do you think we should put up that notorious vlog?
Mmm, maybe with editing.  I have changed my mind to one of the questions of who I would shtup in blog world.  I’m also scared that we are the only people in the world who think we’re as funny as we think we are.

List your ten favourite memories:
Cath barfs.

1.  The sckck4t.  Including requisite for the backwards hand motion.
2.  Sheena breaking the news of leaving, and bursting into tears because her parents suggested a Christian woman’s institution called Dames Huis.
3.  Texting each other while sitting in the same room.
4.  Going to buy milk.
5.  Oh my god. Sheena’s one way road fetish.
5.  The night of my birthday.  Watching random VHS music videos and bitching about life, love and everything else.
6.  The birthday surprise party which I walked into and started off by calling everyone fucking losers.
7.  The first weekend we ever met which turned into the most random girl party ever.
8.  Not sleeping for the first month you were here.  We constantly spoke and talked and laughed.
9.  Everything at The Shath always started with a smoke break, didn’t it?
10.  The universal delete button, greatest invention of all time.  If only we knew how to make it happen.  The idea that exists though.
11.  The lesbian serenade invention session in the bathroom in the middle of one night, with a toothbrush.

I give you my infamous bag of five items that can be anything, what would you want?

1.  Richard Branson’s credit card.
2.  Inflatable car so that I may never have to drive with you again in my life but still arrive safely on my own.
3.  A full time nanny to take care of me.
4.  Insta-fix-everything machine.  Shit situations, all round world instant solution to problems.  What?  Your geyser broke?  Here, have a new one, already installed, workable.
5.  A towel.  In manner of Hitch hikers guide to galaxy.  You must always have a towel.

Any famous last words?
Fuck.  Wait.  No, don’t write “wait”! It’s not my fault I’m awesome.  I’m not sorry.  No regrets.  I should go wake Cam up, don’t make that my last word!

I will miss Cath’s recipe for penis pina’s. I will miss sneaking into the house in the middle of the night to not wake Cam up but finding Cath smoking in the lounge and joining her on the floor with tea while we watch mindless Oprah reruns.  I will miss having someone who knows me so well that I need only give a look and it is known how my day was.  I will miss Cammertime bath time.  I will miss The Shath and everything in it.  I will miss Cath’s laugh drifting through my bedroom window from the lounge and out onto the balcony while we IM’ed each other from different rooms.  I will miss having that sense of someone to share the day’s problems with.  I will miss hearing stories from her funny work environment.

Things might be coming to an end, but a new era is only beginning for the both of us.  Thank you for sharing the ride with the three girls of The Shath.  Stay tuned for my next adventure, if nothing else, it’s going to be a cooker.

11 comments

  1. MsBehavn says:

    OMG – I get back from my holiday and have missed so much!

    Good luck with your move, chicky. I’m sure c@th and Cam are going to miss you, like, a lot!

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