Just because my life hasn’t been interesting enough…

I am convinced that electrical shock(s) I received have begun to morph me into a supernatural.  I’m suddenly able to concentrate for longer periods, I haven’t had a headache in ages, I’m waking up earlier and earlier every day, and I swear half an hour ago the phone rang and I knew who it was before I answered it.

My spidey senses are tingling, I tell you.

I got to work half an hour early this morning, after being here until after 8 last night, and merrily made myself a cup of tea, swapped greetings with the kitchen staff, spoke shit to a few people outside on the balcony, had a smoke, drank my tea, made my way back to my desk, and BAM!

Chickie from the kitchen is tapping my shoulder asking if I dressed in these “pant” on purpose.  Preparing myself for a compliment, I straightened my shoulders, shook my hair and raised my chin, to hear what she was complimenting about my awesome black slacks:

“Eish,” she says while looking over her shoulder.  “Your pant, she’s having a hole”.  Oh, awesome, that’s just fucking perfect. Looking at my butt, I suddenly notice how breezy it is down there…

Fuck me twice on Sunday if half my ass isn't HANGING OPEN FOR THE WORLD TO SEE!

Fuck me twice on Sunday if half my ass isn't HANGING OPEN FOR THE WORLD TO SEE!

The best bit?  I have had meetings all day.  All.  Day.  Not only have I not been able to run home and change, but I’ve had to explain to all colleagues and clients exactly why I’m dressed like Nicole Richie.

Not cool, hey.  Not cool.

13 comments

  1. cath says:

    you = me. remember the sheer gigantic number of times i’ve presented/gone to meetings/had PHOTOS DONE with my shirt open/clothes on inside out/involuntarily exposing myself?

    well done. welcome to professional us. X

  2. The Stuart Hobbs says:

    This is why handbags have X+1 space in them, to store shit like thread and a needle. Don’t judge me because my wallet has a set in it.

  3. CC says:

    LOL omg that’s hillarious, I thought the electric fence story was funny but this definitely tops it, sheesh only you Shebee. And that’s quite a big hole! hah hah thanks for lightening up my stressful afternoon.

  4. mommanats says:

    My job requires me standing up and doing presentations while walking around. Can just imagine the response if I bare my all to my audience 🙂

    Do you think the hole came from sparks coming out of your ass?

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