I’ll be a great mom this time.

I’ll be a great mom this time.

These are the words I found myself saying to my mom this morning.  Not that I’m pregnant, mind you.  She was just referring to how strict I am and that she felt sorry for her future grandbabies.  And that was my reaction.

What. The. Hell.

I don’t know how long I’ve felt I wasn’t good enough for Kiera, but this morning I realised it’s kind of how I’ve always felt.  All along, after all these years, it seems that deep down I felt I was never a good enough mom for her.

I hope that changes with the next child.

This entry was posted in Life.

8 comments

  1. Bridget says:

    Whew! That just hurt my heart. I really hope that feeling does change, because as you know motherhood is riddled with enough guilt that you aren’t doing the best anyway.

    You know you where good enough to be her mom – never for 1 second doubt that.

  2. Cath says:

    I will admit to sitting here, maniacally waiting for this page to load, with one eye on the screen and the other looking at my phone.

    Sheena, you were ALWAYS the best mom for Kiera.

    And you will ALWAYS be the best mom for every single child thereafter.

    X

  3. Marian says:

    Who says you weren’t a great mom last time? Perfection and following rules don’t make great mothers, only love does that.
    xoxo

  4. BiancaW says:

    I reiterate everything that everyone else has said. There are some that believe that we choose our mothers – and therefore, you were most certainly perfect for her – because she chose you.

    And yes – I am pathetically waiting for THAT post now – like I waited for the engagement one.

    🙂

  5. Momma says:

    You were amazing the first time around silly billy. You were and still are good enough for Kiera. ALWAYS

  6. Amy says:

    Just as you were blessed to have her ( if even for such a short time ) she was blessed to have you. As is Jon, and any future children 🙂

  7. Angel says:

    In all honesty, Kiera couldn’t have had a better mom.

    And may I add, I think its a thought that most moms have thought. I can’t tell you how many times I have prayed, “Oh please God don’t let him remember…” or how often I have wondered if I did him a disservice by trying to raise him myself – stupid, impatient, teenage mother that I was.

    HUGE hugs Sheebeliciousness.

  8. Gina says:

    Dude! I smack you! You are an amazing mom to Kiera!!! She chose you and you gave her your all. She couldn’t gave asked for a better mom!

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