Guiltily grateful

There’s a video of Jon and I dancing and I wish I could post it because it not only shows how terribly graceful I am not, and also how wobbly a tummy can really be when one moves with twinkle toes, but it’s a moment captured of Jon and I in our most determined patience with each other.  It’s a moment that shows just how out of one’s comfort zone one’s boyfriend will go to please one.  It’s a moment where we look frazzled for one second and then look up into each others eyes and just relax.  And then we move.  And we nail the next step we’ve learned.  I wish I could show you, but I never will because Jon asked that we keep it just for us and so we will.

Things lately have been so goddamned normal.  It’s been peaceful, quiet and lovely.  It’s been comfortable and familiar and fun.  Unlike the news I read on Facebook about a school mate going through her second divorce, a boy I went to tech with dropping dead of a heart attack and a local cop from my home town being arrested for child pornography and molestation.  I read about all the horror going on around me and I’m guilty and selfishly thinking to myself “thank god none of this affects me”.

I’m selfish I know.

But I’m grateful too, that I’m so blessed and lucky to have this amazing life that I live.

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