I have scheduled this to only go live once I’m confident the news has been passed on to more important people than me so that no one finds out about this via my blog.


One of the few people who thought the world of me died last night. She was a ray of sunshine and elegance in our office when I worked at Tsogo. Never had time for politics, but always made time for a chit chat. She would flit in with glamorous hats, fancy heels and flowing skirts, always her lipstick perfectly in place to frame the brightest, whitest, toothy smile.

She was so proud of her son, talked about him often. She lived with her niece and was a pillar in her community – often looked up to and always in the know of any local gossip, drama or crisis in her neighborhood. At work, she was the lady everyone knew – because if you wanted tickets to anything, you had to get on her good side first. We bonded over the Oscar trial, both of us were hooked on each development and agreed on which outcome we both thought would be fitting. Through this I managed to accidentally charm her somehow and we became good friends.

She could cook up a storm, and refused to remarry despite having an interested party lurking about at any given time. She was fiercly independent and proud, and stubborn to a fault. When I needed to move to her cubicle at work, she took her sweet time in packing up – a week and a half to be exact – and refused to be moved one second before she was ready. I remember being so frustrated when the timelines changed according to her mood that week, but I look back on it now and smile. She was always only ever going to do anything when she was good and ready in her own time. She loved a love story, and when I came in to work the day after getting engaged she literally did a song and a dance for me, and then sat me down and told me her top 5 tips on how to stay happy in a marriage. I still follow those tips today – be happy, be honest, be reliable, be fun, be friends.

She loved to laugh, would throw her head back and guffaw with a slap on my shoulder if she’d laughed too loud “oh, Sheena my sweetie, you’re too funny, wena. I wish I had you with me always, you are so pure hearted”. I’m not sure I’ll ever know why she thought such good things of me. I was nothing but sarcastic, jaded and flippant whenever she was around, but somehow she could see through all of that and connect with me anyway. When I told her I’d resigned, she was the first person to congratulate me, instead of looking dubious or asking what had gone wrong. She knew I needed to do this for me, for my family. She just knew and was so pleased for me. And then she launched into a twenty-five minute dialogue about how she wished she could retire a few years early to be a lady of leisure and live out her days being a gogo. Chats like these would usually happen over a perfectly made cup of tea, where she once taught me her family secret of how to brew tea perfectly in 30 seconds.

I made a promise that I’d send her pics of Aiden when he got big enough to wear the Disney outfits she’d bought him. He fit into his jeans just this last week. I wish I’d kept my promise and sent a photo immediately instead of thinking I’d do it later. Maybe I would have had one last chat with her.

You were a shining star, Dor-Dor, a welcome ally and a special friend. I will miss you.


This entry was posted in Life.


    • Shebee says:

      She really was awesome. Always had sage advice for any situation. Some of it had me in tears of laughter, others nodding my head in thought. I will miss her.
      Shebee recently posted…Dor-Dor.My Profile

  1. Anonymous says:

    What a heartfelt portrayal of this warm and wonderful lady. Thank you Sheena…so difficult to think of this permanent vacant place in my life.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Lovely article Sheena…Dor Dor was a
    true lady with such grace and always not busy for a chat☹️

  3. Deirdre says:

    Beautiful Sheens, she was an amazing lady. Before I left on holiday she said to me “go away and enjoy your holiday and leave work behind your family needs you” I also remember how she always commented how beautiful and respectful I speak to people and that I had a gentle hart❤️ I will miss her dearly!!!!

  4. Miss_k says:

    I wanted to laugh and cry while reading this, as I can totally relate to what you wrote. I remember all the dating advice she would give me, and how she would tell me about her dates and how she was not interested in man who just wanted to text and not call …what a beautiful soul

  5. Al says:

    So well written, from the heart Sheens! Thank you – what a wonderful lady, that touched all our hearts. Lots of love, and special memories for a very special lady xxx

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