In other words, I’ve been interviewing for Jessie’s position for the last month.  Some candidates (read: a total of two) out of the thirty odd are very cool.  The rest? Not so much! Seriously, who applies to a DIGITAL AGENCY for a SOCIAL MEDIA POSITION and doesn’t PUT THEIR FUCKING ONLINE LINKS IN THEIR CV?! Oh, you want to work with me in Social Media? You’re not on Facebook? You’re pulling my leg… Oh, you’re serious.  Um.  Hah hah.  GTFO!

I’m working on two very awesome campaigns at the moment.  One of them involves me going to Cape Town next week.  I’ll get to hang out with my mate Talfer again, it’s been about two years since I last saw him.  Also, I’m lucky enough to have been set up to meet the actors of The A-Team, hang out with them for a couple of days and generally just hobnob with the glittery and glamorous people.  And get paid at the same time.  Haha.  I get paid to do this?  Stop playing!

The other campaign is something really close to my heart.  It’s all about people with vaginas.  Yep.  Women’s Day is coming up, see, so I’ve been brainstorming and staying at work late and calling in favours and arguing with designers and shouting with team members and laughing and scheming.  I absolutely love what I do for a living.  It’s been seven months now and I still pinch myself to make sure I’m not dreaming.  And sometimes I pinch myself when falling asleep on the boardroom table during meetings after long nights, but we won’t talk about that.

Ooh, ooh, I have a new phone!  Yes, another Blackberry.  But this is the new Storm 2 and can I just say?  I AM IN LOVE bitches.  Wow.

Of course, with all of this happening, I’ve skipped two weigh-in classes.  Sigh.  I’m still behaving really well and my jeans are practically falling off me these days which is really cool for my body but not so much for my bank account.

Oh look, our delivery maintenance guy is in a tux.  He’s so swanky.  Shame, he blushed when I told him he looks smart.  I didn’t know black dudes could blush.

I’m on heaving medication, could you tell?  I bet you couldn’t.  Hahaha.

Right.  It’s TGIF.  I’m out of here.  Peace!

In order to save me some time when blogging, I downloaded this cool little app thingie. I will now upload an image of utter seriousness to see if this thing works, as well as tag this post in a few random categories. I’d appreciate your feedback of my awesomeness soonest.

Cats are being picked up on Sunday, btw. Awwwww. I’m going to be so bleak without the little shits.

Also, I have 4 up-coming late nights and I’m shitting meself. I’m old(ish) you know… I can’t be doing these things anymore.

Okay. ‘Till later. Luff you.

Confused and inappropriately naïve, Jon claimed to not know what I meant.  “But it’s seven AM in the bloody morning on a Saturday!”  to which I replied, “ya, well, nature waits for no man”.  After some whimpering, a lot of mumbled excuses and comments of “but can’t you just go quickly?  I’ll put the kettle on while you’re out!” I yanked the door open in frustration and gave him The Look.

Faced with the awe-inspiring look, he coiled into a little ball and started rocking back and forth.  “Don’t make me do it, Sheen.  I can’t.  I don’t want to.  I won’t!” he frantically whispered through his kneecaps, his eyes pleading and determined to not back down.  I think he must have seen the determination in my face, the absolute desperation of this dire situation when I looked him firmly in the eye, grabbed him by the balls and calmly stated: Get thyself into yon chariot and get. me. some.

To find out what I’m talking about go here to read the full article I wrote, published on Female2female this morning.

Jax enters room, promptly looks at me and starts laughing.  "Go home, Sheen – you look completely in need of it!"

"Lets go to Jozi for the weekend" says I, deadpanned. "You can visit Craig, and I can meet some of my friends who have been sharing their life with me for months now, just without being face to face".

2.45pm – racing back to Uvongo having come from packing my bags at home, I arrive at Jax, who is in utter turmoil.  Eventually depart for Jo’burg just after 3.30pm.  Am hyped up, calling / smsing / emailing everyone concerned.  Sudden Blogger Meet.  Last min decision, lets do this!

6.00pm – stop in the middle of nowhere’s Caltex to find a toilet, food & fresh water.  Need solid ground to cope with Jax’s driving methods.

7.30pm – Call Craig, tell him to yell at Jax and let me drive as she’s nearly killed us, thrice.

8.46pm – Get shoved into dashboard of car as brakes are slammed, yet again, just before we pop up some poor truck drivers exhaust pipe.

9.00pm – Stop at Wimpy for desperation coffee.  Smoking self to smitherines.  COnsider asking taxi nearby for life.  Willing to pay in pounds.

12.00pm – still not arrived.  Good lord I am tired of being passenger driver, and having to deal with stubborn driver and replace her horrible night vision with my even more acute blindness.

12.20pm – take wrong offramp, land up near Boksberg.  Or Moedersfontein.  Some place where dey speak loik viss. 

12.35pm – arrival – yay!  Rush to loo, then to fridge, crack open a bottle of wine, jump in shower, throw on jarmies, and get into bed.

Looking forward to seeing Glugs and Angel in the morrow.  Hey Glugs, haven’t really cleared this up with you guys yet – but can I crash on your couch tonight?  Oh wait, you did offer to let Damien have the couch and me the bed.  That sounds good to me!

Going back home in brand new convertable belonging to Kimbo.  Go my friend, I’m too excited for you!

Okay, nighty night and happy bunny easter egg weekend!

So.  I had a frog tell me that he and his gang were planning on robbing me of my (non-existant) ipod while eating food out of my (non-existant) fridge in my (non-existant) home.

I stared blankly at him, and mutely nodded my head.

The frog then turned around, burped, hopped to the window and farted into the room as he was windswept away.

Kinda interesting, no?

WordPress.  How bout that?  

Here I am.  There you are.  Lets make this simple, pimple.  You don’t crash on me, I won’t neglect you.  Deal?

In the meantime, you should know there is another – her name is Blogspot, and eventually I will probably ask you for a threesome.  I hope you are open minded like that.  Here are her goods, should you wish to check her out in the meantime.

Ok.  I’ll check in on you later.