Bridget the magnificent!

In light of current one-upmanship at the hand of Bridget, I realised that this interview could not possibly wait the original 4 weeks I told her.  Also, she is having issues loading my site, so maybe this is the best time to publish, since she does scare me somewhat. 

 

Okay.  pen and paper on hand.
I got my fake smile on, you better not misquote me you psydo journalist
I would never, bitch.  i have integrity.  Bridget.  What does your day job entail?
My day job entials sifting through manuscripts, picking the good shit, getting someone to read it and having lotsa expensive coffee.
Which is the one blogger you would like to get down and dirty with?
I would love to kiss face with you Sheena
In your dreams! I believe you were in two car accidents recently, totalling both cars.  Should you not be banned from SA roads?
Well the first acccidents was not my fault. A truck was driving in the wrong direction on a one-way street. The second one, I was not driving although I suspect i might have driven the driver to try and kill me by attempting to fly over a cliff at 130km/ph
So you do take responsibility for the 2nd then.  Pray tell, why?
No, you nosy cow!
You are so uncooperative, goddamnit!  When you splashed onto our blogger circle, did you ever expect to get so involved in others lives?
If I had known you would go on to charm my ex boyfriend I definitely wouldn’t have read your sodding blog. Am very bitter about that.  To be honest, I think I have managed to stay aloof, and that is how I like it. Bar for a few bad bad cases of blog infactuation, I’m still just enoying some awesome writing.
Wha?  i thought you were a reader long before said ex bf? Don’t be blaming a poor innocent for your blog crush on me.
So what?  I can use it as a point of argument if I want to. I didn’t get the brief that said I was to be logical in this blasted interview.
Name 3 people you would have over and what you would serve each one

  • My ex, my kid’s dad: I would serve him revenge.
  • Scarlet Ohara – I would serve her some good sense so that men never have an excuse to say, "Frankly my dear …."
  • Will Smith – I would serve him me!

Thing on your body you are least in love with?
Fokit, I’m vain. I likes all of me
Why doesn’t that bloody answer surprise me in the least?
Erm … the answers lies with you, I think
Who would you most like to interview and get info on?
If I could have a dose of Veritaserum, I’d get busy on Zuma.
Your shoe size?
5
Noice.  can i borrow some of your Jimmy’s?
The Choos are priceless
You are currently in a relationship with what appears to be Prince Charming.  Hows that working for you?
Not reallly well at the moment to be honest. He’s making me fat on happiness.
Is he on hand to be lent out?
I suspect the poor man might be having a bad case of the Bridge-litis. I recently sent hm a stripper in his office and word is he was trying to run away from her. As well all know, the Bridge-litis is an incredibly debilidating illness if mixed with other diseases, especially the Sheena-litis.
You are a legend.  I have an enormous crush on you
*akward desk bow* The feeling is mutual SheeBear
The title of your first published book will be?
Black as White
How do you feel about the new SA Rugby coach?  (Catered question for the lads, you dig?)
He’s a bit on the ugly side no? I mean, when the Boks were losing, I could console myself by looking at White’s buns and indulging in impue thoughts until I forgot about the loss. With this guy, I might want to bash his face in.
Favourite flavour
black
BLACK IS NOT FLAVOUR!
I know
You happy with your noombies even?
What the eff are noombies?
Your boobs, dork
Oooh, love em! They make men whirl!
Age you first discovered you were fabulous
I was 7. I won Miss Dorpie!

 

So, aside from totally being in love with her own self, this woman clearly needs a bigger head to fit her ego.  She also astounds me with her writing skills.  In being completely unorthodox, I take my hat off to her. 

 

I would also like to put in a disclaimer that I did this interview with her BEFORE she did her interview with me.  Therefore, I am the original psuedo journalist in these parts, thank you very much.