30 days in 30 minutes

This is an old post I just found in my drafts.  I think I wrote the first half the day Jon and I moved in together, and finished off the second half a few minutes ago.

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I changed my mind.  Everyone else in the world seems to be doing this blogging thinger where you dedicate 30 days to 30 topics.  We all know I don’t have the attention span to be so brilliant, so I’m gonna answer them all in one blog post.

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself

I take things way too personally.

 

Day 02 → Something you love about yourself

I don’t stay angry for very long.  I get mad, very mad, but after I’ve processed why I’m mad, I move on.

 

Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.

Shoowee.  I suppose it’s Kiera’s death day.  Even though I now know she wouldn’t have lived for very much longer, if I hadn’t given her a bath when I did, she wouldn’t have relapsed that very moment, which means she probably wouldn’t have died that day.

 

Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.

Jon, for shouting at me today when we moved the couch upstairs.  It’s not my fault he stubbed his toe!!!!

 

Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.

Need to go overseas.  Serious.  I’ve never been.

 

Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.

Uh… bury another kid? That’d be uncool in the very biggest degree.

 

Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living.

My brothers and sisters.  They’ve made me laugh and held my hand when I needed it, and even when I didn’t.

 

Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you badly.

Kiera’s dad.

 

Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

Kimbo.  We used to be so close, but because of a few issues and me not really making the effort to keep the friendship alive, it’s over.

 

Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.

Sheesh.  This is pretty personal.  I need to let go someone who has been around for longer than most other people.  But it’s hard, and I still don’t know why I’m so upset about just moving on.

 

Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

Public speaking – although I only do it for the love of having all attention on me, I’ve never really explored it further.  Maybe I should since I usually get a great response whenever I talk in front of a crowd.

 

Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.

My awesome driving skillz.

 

Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days.

Snow Patrol, Tracy Chapman, Glee Club.  Yes, Glee Club, I said it, what?

 

Day 14 → A hero that has let you down.

Meh, I don’t want to write about this.

 

Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

My mom.  Not that I’ve tried living without her, but now that she lives so close to me again, I’m not sure how I coped with not seeing her for months on end.  I love my mom, she’s awesome. Chocolate, smokes, Jon & my family.

 

Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.

Back fat Sally, Tina the talking tummy, Tessa & Theresa the thunder thighs.

 

Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

Anne Rice’s books, all of them.  She opened my eyes to all things supernatural, fictional or otherwise.  I love that genre now.

 

Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.

Marriage as a whole used to freak me out.  But now I’m cool with it.  For me, it doesn’t matter if you’re gay, bi, straight or imaginary, if you want to get married, get married.  Who am I to have an opinion?

 

Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?

They exist.

 

Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Been there, done that, burnt the t-shirt.  I don’t think either of them are very good for anyone who takes part in excess.  I’ll have a drink or two every now and again but I will never get involved in hardcore drugs because I’ve seen the people who are hurt by users.  It’s not cool, it’s not fun and it’s not a good idea.

 

Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

What a kak scenario.  I’d rush to the hospital if I could, or book a flight to get there as soon as possible if I couldn’t be there immediately.

 

Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.

I really regret a lot of things in life, but wishing them away would mean denying who I am today, and what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.  I am strong.

 

Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.

I wish that I’d made a bigger effort to go overseas when I had all the time to do it.  Now, if I do go abroad, I’ll only be able to do it in a leave period, which isn’t very long.

 

Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs.

Alanis Morissette – In Praise of the Vulnerable Man – for Cath to remind her that this too shall pass

Foundations – Build me up Buttercup – for my Momma, LLB, George & Laina because it reminds me of them singing on the lounge table when I was a child

 

Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.

Being alive is underrated.  It’s so easy to get bogged down by all the bullshit, so many people forget that being alive is awesome.  I believe I’ve made choices that have kept me breathing in order to do something amazing eventually.  What that amazing thing is, I don’t quite know yet.  But it’ll come to me eventually.

 

Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

I had a moment once.  But it was a moment and it passed and I’ve never truly considered giving up seriously.  Suicide is a selfish and horrible thing leaving a quake in your wake.  I didn’t intend to rhyme there, but I’m leaving it.

 

Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?

I am in love with my career, home, relationship & family.  Everything is going well, I am very lucky and eternally grateful.

 

Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

If I got someone pregnant I would kak in my pants!  And then I’d alert the media because, damn, I’d go viral.

 

Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.

Sigh.  My bohdi.  Stummak een, chest out!

 

Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

Dear Sheena,

Live every moment, love your loved ones, be faithful, remain grateful, thank strangers and be nice to those who need it.  You’re a survivor.

Love,

Sheena

5 comments

  1. Cath says:

    Alanis Morissette – In Praise of the Vulnerable Man – for Cath to remind her that this too shall pass

    Thank you. It’s so funny. It doesn’t matter the distance between us, we remain exactly the same.

    Thank you.

    Oh, and shit pooh, I’ll see you soon. X

  2. Cath says:

    Wee once or wee twice? Thrice?!? You might need to get that shit checked out. LOL.

    (and yes, I promise, one day soon, I will swear online again somewhere other than just the comments section of your blog. LOL)

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