27 ply toilet paper

Two weeks ago Pats, an old family friend who is very awesome, came to me with what she was convinced was a revelation:

Pats: I have decided that sad people blog more often.

Me: Hey?

Pats: This one chick I know is living proof.  She has decided that she’s happy and in love, so she doesn’t need to blog as often.

Me: That’s awesome!  I wish I was like that!

Pats: er… Sheen, you’re the only blog I read…


Pats: ……..

Me: OH!

= = = =

So, I wish it was true.  It would be rad if that were the reason I hardly blog.  Thing is, as happy and in love as I really am, I’ve just been dealing with life criseseses left, right and centre.

  • Work is still insane, that hasn’t changed, but it’s not bad things – it’s just busy things.
  • Jon’s dad is very ill.  Although it seems he’s back on the mend now, it’s been a scary few weeks.  I’ve been very worried about him, but more so for Jon’s mom and mostly for Jon.  My love has not been a happy chappy, and who can blame him?
  • My mom.  She’s not in a good place and I worry about her daily.  I wish I wasn’t so far, and at the same time I’m relieved that I am, and then I feel guilty.  It’s a rabid and nasty force field of a cycle made of viscious: worried, guilty, relieved, more guilty, worried.
  • But I’m not blogging to bitch about any of that right now, I’m blogging to tell you something super important!

    Jon and I were discussing a grocery list last night and things changed in a different course, verbally.

    Me: How are we for condoms?

    Jon: we’re okay.

    Me: … We need more condoms.

    Jon: and toilet paper.

    Me: what?! We just bought toilet paper.

    Jon: you go through more toilet paper than anyone else I’ve ever met in my whole life.

    Me: It’s because I use lots.  I’m scared my finger goes through the stuff, so I wrap and I wrap and I wrap.

    Jon: Wow.  Things I only ever wished I could discuss with my girlfriend…

    Me: Shut up, it’s only toilet paper.

    Jon: Yes, the 27 ply kind.

    I love our relationship.  Jon teases me constantly.  And even though both of us are under tremendous amounts of pressure and stress, I love that we have each other to use as comic relief.

    On another note, it looks like I’m expanding my team at work again.  From 1 to four in under six months.  *fistpunch* Yeah bitch!


    1. Tara says:

      I’m so happy I can go to A and tell him that I am not the only one with the finger fear or the preventative measures taken i.e. using wrap and wrap and wrap…

    2. Shebee says:

      Don’t be silly, Billy, put a condom on your willy!
      Be wise, condomise!
      Don’t be a fool, wrap your tool!
      If you like it then you gotta put a ‘dome on it!
      If it’s not on it, then it’s not in it!

      I’m well trained, dude.

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