28
Talkin’ about a revolution…
There’s a few new developments in my life that you might not know about yet.
1. My mom is moving to Joburg. Although my mom doesn’t make too much of an appearance here anymore (divorce issues, too many eyes on this blog, blah blah blah), I’m very excited to have my true best friend within a 5 minute drive to have coffee with. How excited Jon is, however, cannot be determined. He especially hasn’t said much which makes me side-eye him quite often 
2. I’m looking at investments. I’m sorry blog, don’t fall down dead. Yes, it’s come to that time in my adult life that I start look at investing some cash dollar in which to squander when I’m 89, in nappies, drunk and terrifying my grand kids. Jon and I have different views on how I should start saving money, so any additional assvice would be appreciated here.
3. I feel different. Almost… responsible, somehow. I know, right? I’ve begun to think long term, lately. Instead of splashing out money on irrelevant crap, I’ve started thinking about outdoor furniture, for instance. And saving for our next holiday trip, or for that specific expensive thing I want. I’ve even gone to the gynie to sort out my inside parts in case one day I want to, you know, have midgets.
4. I’ve made some cuts in my life. I’ve realised I hang on to toxic friendships, I’ve forgiven people no longer in my life for things they did that ate away at me, I’ve said sorry to others that deserved it, I’ve rekindled important relationships and I’ve written off others. After the audit of people in my life, I’m lucky enough to be satisfied with my lot. I know exactly who I can approach for whichever reasons, and who I shouldn’t. It helps.
5. I’ve been happy for a while now. Stressed out, over worked and probably a little manic, but I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I look back at how things have changed over the last 2 years and a lot of the credit needs to go to my awesome Jon. He’s taught me to be honest with myself, push the boundries and to believe in me more than I did before. I know he’s reading this, so to him I’d like to say “Stop being bashful, love, you’ve helped me make a lot of changes in my life. Thank you”.
6. My birthday is coming up in less than 4 weeks. For the first time in years, it’ll be spent with my family! Or at least, a small part of my family. I’ve ordered an Angry Birds cake from Angel’s alter ego, The Cupcake Lady. I am SO excited. Even though I’m going downhill to the 30′s, I’m still the biggest kid on the block when it comes to birthdays.
So there you have it, an update. I hope you’re all doing well, too!
PS: since I don’t blog that often anymore, here’s something that I’ve enjoyed lately: Suri’s Burn Blog. Hilarious parody tumblog written (but not really) by Tom Cruise & Katy’s daughter, Suri.
20
If you were stranded alone on an island forever…
1. which music album would you take with you?
2. if it was a choice between taking a blanket or mozzie repellant (there are loads of mozzies on this island)?
3. if you were allowed one phone call a year, who would it be to?
4. if you had to barter with the natives for food, what wouldn’t you be willing to do?
5. if you had a choice between coconut or raw fish every day for a year, which would you go for?
i’m so glad i don’t have to live on an island. but then again, i do live in jozi. it’s almost the same, except the natives are the taxis, jmpd officers and roadsidepreneurs, and the music plays in my head, the traffic replaces the mozzies, i barter my soul for a salary and i live on the internet instead of an annual phone call.
it’s been one of those days…
12
Montecasino Mavericks of Chance Meander: Awesome.
Edith Venter and Jon are BFF’s for life. They met at the Montecasino Mavericks of Chance Meander I told you about last week, bonded over a game of poker and I snuck a picture of them when Edith wasn’t looking:
Check the grin. What a groupie.
So anyway, aside from the very important fact highlighted above, let me tell you how lucky I am!
We arrived at Southern Sun Montecasino to check in at 2pm on Friday afternoon. This honestly is my favourite hotel in Joburg, it’s restaurant Punchinellos has some of the best chefs in the country, their lobby is gorgeous and their bar / lounge area is so comfy. Not to mention the rooms! Go click on that link and look at their rooms. Speaking of rooms, this was in ours as we walked in:
- Mini bottle of bubbly (Jaycee Le Rocks, like Tumi says it, cos she’s super classy)
- A poker set
- Cool blingy key ring
- Martini set – raaaaaaaad!
- A personalised letter from Monte’s GM, ending off with “Can’t wait to meet you later”. Nice touch.
- An envelope with free double tickets to just about every live feature happening at Monte right now;
- The Nandos Jozi Comedy Festival
- Piazza on ice
- Boktown SA vs. Aus rugby match
- Numetro tickets
- 45% discount on Jewel Africa (bling bling. Birthday next month, dear boyfriend, just saying…)
After ripping open the freebies, I we jumped on the bed, rolled around on the carpeted floor and ate all the welcome cupcakes, truffles and snacks we then put our game faces on to meet the other Mavericks at La Scala restaurant. There we were fed finger foods, cocktails, VIP bracelets and awesome scarves to avoid the chilly outdoor wind:
Love my neon pink nail polish!
After being briefed on Mavericks of Chance campaign, we were officially welcomed by the GM Steve, and divided into groups to go into the casino and kick each others asses. Which I took to heart and did my utmost. And I won almost all of the rounds in our team, which put me in the final round to win 1 of 3 brilliant prizes.
Except for Roulette. I sucked at Roulette. And poker, come to think of it. Zwai Bala became my number 1 nemesis in these two rounds. Rodney (pictured above) was totally biased and formed an alliance with Zwai. What a shelebrilite!
Anyway, I won’t bore you with the details of how I lost these two silly games – suffice it to say that on average, I rocked it and came 2nd over all, walked home with an awesome LG hifi & sound system and about R650 in credit on my newly acquired Club Festival card. Which Jon and I went and blew immediately after dinner that night. But all was not lost as we cashed out R1000 on our way back to the hotel. What a win!
Once back at the hotel, I would not accept that poker got the better of me, so we cracked open the poker set Monte gave us, went to chill in the Southern Sun Montecasino hotel lobby, ordered some sherry and hot chocolate and Jon taught me how to play poker until the wee hours of the morning.
The next morning we woke up (I haven’t slept as well since getting out of that beautiful bed, by the way) and headed down for a breakfast for hungover champions.
There are loads more photos available on the Montecasino Facebook page here. Check them out, I look like a dork in most of them.
Thank you SO much to Montecasino (and Avon’s team for the hard work they put in making this an experience of a lifetime) once again, I can’t wait to go back and be a Maverick of Chance and win my millions, because as I learnt this weekend, gambling isn’t isolated in taking chances – we take chances every day of our lives, like now – I’m about to take a chance in traffic on my way home. Look out, Joburg taxis!
8
I’m a Maverick!
Montecasino’s pretty sharp when it comes to identifying influencers and how to engage with them. Personally, Jon and I are regulars at Monte, Alex from work actually complains that its the only place I ever check into on Foursquare. It’s around the corner from our house, and it also hosts SA’s biggest and best cinema, so it’s usually where we go on our date nights.
This afternoon Jon and I have been invited to join a bunch of other twits to take part in their Montecasino Mavericks of Chance Casino Meander. We’ll be given a lesson on all the games and how to make it rich, bitch, when playing. We’ll be plied with inkahol and casino chips (do they still have chips? I hope so, I wanna be all “I’m in Las Vegas!!!!”) and have a prize giving at the end before we go off to dinner and then check into the Southern Sun Montecasino fancy shmancy hotel for a mini getaway.
It’s in aid of their Mavericks of Chance campaign, see the awesome ad my mates at Halo agency (Word, Dean!) made here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_71WxEzkvFk
I’ll let you know on Monday how it all goes, I have a management meeting now that I have to sit in and pretend I’m not severely hung over from the wine tasting before the International Ballet Gala we attended last night.
It hurts to be in demand, bitches.
PS: Three blog posts in one week? If it snows, I take full responsibility!
6
No Regret Friday’s
Some of you may already know that while not often, I do sometimes on very special occasions crack open a bottle of something fun and get a bit pickled with mates. Mostly, I forget how to open my szhips (drunk speak for zips) or trip over my own feet or climb into bed with Jon and poke him incessantly all the while giggling like a moron until he wakes up, glares at me and huffs to the other end of the bed.
Sometimes I tend to make drunken phone calls to Cath, because of all my friends she is the one person who speaks Drunk Sheena better than I do. Probably because most of the drunken moments I’ve had in life were with her. And I wasn’t even the one who dug in a bin looking for a nonvegetarian sausage (long story for another time). Not withstanding the night we discovered our self-professed ability to channel Suetjie into our very own Shath, I’m a messy drunk.
And even when I’m not drunk, I’m an even messier driver. So I never, ever, combine the two. And you shouldn’t either. Therefore, I am in full support of SAB’s “No Regret Friday” campaign, which allows you to show your support and encourage your friends to be responsible with their drinking. You can get involved in a number of ways:
- Tweet about it and using the hash tag #noregretfriday
- Log onto http://www.noregretfriday.co.za to see personal accounts by people who have been affected by drunk driving (not pretty)
- Tell your mates about it. Friends don’t let friends drive drunk. I personally have a spare room made up always for friends who shouldn’t be driving home drunk.
But all is not lost! If you’re one of those stubborn okes who refuses to give up your own bed (even if it’s just to get home and find out you’re sleeping on the couch for being drunk anyway), let me introduce you to Goodfellas. Goodfellas will pick you up and drive your car home when you’ve had a few too many, as well as assisting you by listening to your drunken attempt at singing Alanis Morrisette (I’m looking at you, Cath), and then comfort your Loser Complex when the buzz wears off.
One friend of mine swears he convinced his Goodfella fella to stop off at MaccyDee’s on the way home for his munchies. Win!
Sign up for Goodfellas now & make a pledge here for No Regret Friday.
PS: You should see the random photo frame package dropped off at my office from SAB reminding me why being a messy drunk should really only happen infrequently.
4
How to make a black person blush.
On Sunday I had my team around for a bit of lunch and an official work reason. There we were, munching on the most amazing red velvet chocolate cheese cake, and discussing how it was bought.
Me: So my mate Angel runs a cupcake / baking business, The Cupcake Lady, and she lets some of us beta test her new recipes, this is one of them.
Tumi: Angel? Is that her name? Is she a bushnanian?
Me: Haha, um, no.
Dave: Her surname is Conradie.
Me: Yes, but she used to be a Swemmer.
Tumi: ….
* A few minutes go by, topic has changed at least twice, the group has resumed talking about the amazing cheese cake, Dale is asking if he can lick his plate (he’s from Boksburg, we won’t judge), Dave is cheating on his diet by making love to his portion of the cheese cake, Alex is silent, eyes closed and savouring every bite… When suddenly, Tumi decides to interrupt us all *
Tumi: Okay, so she’s not a bushnanian, she used to be a swimmer and now her surname is Conradie?
Me: Wait, what? We’re back to Angel again?
Tumi: Yes! Angel. Engel. ”[In a heavily accented black voice] Ooh, En-Gel”.
Me: Okay, what about her?
Tumi: Dude! You’re like totally casual about the fact that you have a WHITE MAID! WHAT THE FUCK? And she bakes you cakes! I hate you!
In confusion we all look around the table, not wanting to offend the only black person in our midst, especially since she’s walking along the Julius Malema “BUT SHE IS A RAY SEEEEST” vibe. The dinner table goes to an awkward silence while I quickly go over the conversation in my head to see where we went wrong. Eventually, it hits me.
Me: TUMI! YOU DUMBASS! I SAID MY “MATE” ANGEL, NOT “MAID”!
And bang went the rest of the afternoon’s entertainment.
Nothing is funnier than seeing a black person blush over a racial faux pas. Especially when they’re a self-professed coconut, it’s hilarious.
PS: If you’re in Joburg, order all your baked goodnesses from Angel. She is ah-maize-innnnnng!
